Poster: 1m1w @ Mon Dec 15, 2008 5:12 am
Dear Santy Claws, I hold this letter in my hand consider it a plea, a petition, a kind of prayer. There are two people here and I want you to kill them...
No... wait! On second thought, I'll use my Jesus' Birthday Credit for something even better!
What I want Santy, what I really fucking want, besides sympathetic control of my cremaster and dartos muscles (party tricks galore oh lord) is .flv hosting on Latewire and the ability to put flash videos on the front page like all the big boys do on the other fancy blogs. I promise not to put any (geriatric) porno up, scout's honor! Work your Christmas magic Sinter Klaus, don't leave me behind, utilize the remaning Kaballah practitioners of the world if you must, for this is something I want ever so dearly! Oh modern avatar of Thor, with your thunderous hammer and annoying reindeer, grant me this one wish and I promise I'll get around to finishing the main plot of Thundercats. I can even say that I won't attempt to host anything unweildy in size! I don't know what more I can bring to the table here, St. Nick... but I am going to fist Mrs. Klaus in a completely nonsexual way if you do not acquiesce and I may even consider unleashing Jack Frost who has as you know always had a habit of nipping at your ho's.